Stories From Your Heart November 28, 2008
Posted by qnaoflife in Feelings, Hope, Thoughts.Tags: crush, infatuation, unrequited love
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Feelings can be unreal..
I remembered the first time you named me with your playful nickname. I told you I did not want to be named other than my own name but you refused to listen. Whenever we meet, you never fail to tease me with your new found nickname for me. Most of the times, I never want to acknowledge it. Perhaps I’m stubborn. Perhaps I’m too serious to play this kind of game. Whatever it is, I begin to adapt to the nickname you gave me.
I wanted a sweet revenge. I created a nickname for you too. You take it with a smile on your face. I could never make you get angry at me, no matter what I do. You take everything so lightly in whatever I say. Sweet words, thoughtful actions and the way you say your teasing words slowly setting itself way into my heart without my conscious consent. I make it clear to myself that this is you being you and nothing more.
One day, you make me startled when you said the words I would not say if I do not mean it. I knew then not to take you seriously because when I do, I do not how to face you and my feelings for you. I dismiss the thoughts because I do not want to fall when you are not there to catch me. I could not dissect your feelings as you always being nice to everyone. It is sort of hard to tell. From now I tell myself I’m not taking the risk to wound my heart again.
It was a jolly night where everyone drinking and yanking away when it happened. The very thing I surprise myself with. I wished time had stopped the moment I realized what I did. I wished I had the clock turned just that few minutes backward and acted differently. But all these did not happen. Instead I’m left with a scar and endless questions I throw to myself trying to give a valid reason for things to happen that way. Nothing. No answer. This is so frustrating. Within the free will that is given, circumstances take over when the choice is made.
Wrong choice made. I hardly make one. Why this has to be the one? Am I too consumed with my own self-made feelings that I ended up being irrational?
Hey fren, what’s up with you? I called your handphone, but can’t get through to you.
Hey, call me back when you can!!!
Friend, just writing a fiction story
Was away for holiday my friend and silly me for not turning on the roaming service so can’t use the line elsewhere. 
wat???!!! fiction story??!!! i hit u in d head if i see u man…
Don’t gal..I know how brutal you can get..hahah! just kidding. Anyway, what so ciak lat about this being fiction story? sound too emotional to be a fiction you mean?
ciak lat because you causing me or the ppl around you to worry about you. U imagine u some else and u care for this person.. ur friend.. and you read this blog what would you feel?
i feel emotionally i wouldn’t put my trust on you lohh… if i can go thru so much and still smile.. you can do it too mah.. ok hon. Love from me.
The truth can be a lie and a lie can be the truth. Sometimes in reality we are faced with this kind of situation that we need to put our thinking cap to figure out what can be the truth and what are the lies in those words. I am not saying whatever I said is a lie neither do I mean it’s the truth. What I intend to spark interest from this entry is perhaps for your imagination to distinguish what can be acceptable as truth and lies. Also, to understand the pain of unrequited love is always there for those who has tried to love. This can happen to everyone of us, perhaps once in life if we are lucky. By what I mean lucky is that we dare to love when there’s no basis of security that the person we give our utmost care will look our way and do the same. I met some people who do not even dare to jeopardize their emotional state for this matter and I’m not saying they are wrong to behave that way. It is just the risk they won’t take. I take the risk because I was taught to love, regardless what the outcome may be. There’s no denying the pain can be hard to bear, but I choose to live through it. And yes, I can still smile even after all this, because all the pain I went through makes me who I am.